it was a really interesting noise, so I carried on with it, trying out different mouth shapes...
"OOWOOWOOWOOWOOWOOWOOWOOW!"
and then I suddenly realised, too late, that I was on the ground floor, so I cut the noise... but the lift doors are thin, you can hear everything through them...
so I exit the lift, to see a veiled Muslim woman, looking at me with like confusion and a certain amount of worry, perhaps even terror... all I could see was these deep black eyes, lookin at me, tryin to work out exactly what grade of nut I might be... how embarrassin'...
but also really funny, once I got out of the building
I know what I should have done now- made that 'bibble-bibble-bibble' noise that you do moving your finger rapidly over your lips... that would have left her in NO DOUBT as to my status as somebody to be avoided AT ALL COSTS forevermore...
I really relate to Russell Brand's quote that life is just a string of embarrassin' incidents strung together by him talking about those incidents...
5 comments:
Hello
I like the story. It's funny that one of the best way to handle embarrassment is to be even more odd.
I was in a shop the other day and heard a man bellow out in laughter from the depth of his chest. I though what a funny laugh. I then became aware that he and person he was with where looking at me with discussed. I then I realized I had mimicked him. Not just with sound but with a jolly swaying back and forth. So I just pretended I was singing a song with laughy bits in.
Also my trousers fell down the other day too when getting out of a car. Never had that one before, though I have always felt one day it would happen.
hi darren,(good to see you here- it's nice to start a blog...) I like your trousers fallin' down story... made me think of like one of those black and white films, where somebody blows a whistle every time the main dude slips on a banana skin, or whatever...
it's weird how these embarrasin' events just seem to spiral out of control. I tought about this event on the street just after it happened, and that made me laugh out loud in an embarrassed way- and then someone else was looking at me like I was odd...!
I am just glad it's all an illusion, otherwise I would be so terribly embarressed, in a very english way...
I can relate to this story, I've had lots of similar ones like this; "caught in the act" ...yep best to just laugh or act mad.
I bought these trousers from TK maxx and the second time i wore them the zip broke off and i couldn't undo the zip.
So i was still in the trousers and went to the pub. I needed to piss and i realised i couldn't unzip so i had to shuffle the pants down far enough to get the old chap out.
This meant i had about 5-6 inches (estimated)of arse crack showing, which goes beyond the realm of working class builder type and more into the realms of cheap slut brighton rent-boy.
Just as i started pissing, a big surly metal block comes in and gives me a confused frown; part fear, part disgust at seeing meexposing my hairy arse. Hay ho. After pulling my pants up i tried to walk out of there as manly as possible and retain some dignity.
Embarassing moment part 2.
This was even more embarrassing. I was sat outside the photo dark room on the stairs of the art college in middlesboro a few years back.
I thought i would entertain my fellow students by telling this joke, which to work has to be done in this "ah so" chinese style accent.
we're half way between the 1st and second floor. As i start the joke i'm vaguelly aware of the sound of feet coming up the stairs.
The joke went like this (imagine it being told in Burt Kwouk (Kato from Pink Panther) type voice "Old Chinese proverb say; man who go bed with itchy arse wake up with smewwy finger in morning".
As i was the last couple of words of the joke, a really cute chinese girl walks up the stairs and looks right at me looking embarrassed and upset.
I immediately feel like a little ant. A little daft racist ant who sounds like Bernard manning. I put my head down and i imagine that i looked as red as a ribena man.
I thought about trying to say something but couldn't.
I bumped into her a couple of times after that and it was really awkward.
It so easy to make an arse of yourself without even trying
very true... thanks for reading and sharing, Sean. this blog entry is becoming like a wee support group for us sometime numpties...
group hug!
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